Throughout my life, I’ve been fortunate to learn teachings that guide how I try to live, lead, and treat others.
Many of these teachings came from my family—especially my kokum (grandmother) and the Elders in my community.
One day my kokum emphasized something that stayed with me. She talked about the importance of living a good life, doing your best to live the right way every day. At the time, I didn’t fully understand what she meant. But over the years, those teachings became clearer.
Today, I want to share four words from my language that have shaped how I approach life, leadership, and relationships.
These teachings are also very similar to values found in many other Indigenous languages and cultures.
1. Respect – Living in Balance
The first teaching centers around respect.
When many people hear the word “respect,” they think about how we speak to one another. But where I come from, respect goes much deeper than that.
Respect means honoring everything around us.
Respect for people.
Respect for animals.
Respect for the plants and medicines that grow from the earth.
Respect for the land that sustains us.
In our teachings, we are reminded that we shouldn’t simply take from the world around us.
We must give before we take.
For example, when harvesting medicines like sweetgrass or other traditional plants, it’s common to offer tobacco first as a sign of gratitude and respect. We take only what we need and leave the rest for the earth to continue providing.
These teachings remind us that balance matters—not just for individuals, but for the world around us.
2. Take Control of Your Mind
The second teaching came from an Elder who played an important role in my life.
When I was a teenager, my mother encouraged me to bring tobacco to him and ask questions about life. At the time, I didn’t even know what questions to ask—I was just a kid trying to learn.
But one piece of wisdom he shared has stayed with me ever since.
He told me about the importance of using your mind in a good way.
In simple terms, that means taking control of your mind.
Because if you don’t control your mind, the world will do it for you.
Think about how often we reach for our phones. How often distractions pull us away from the present moment.
If we’re not careful, we lose control of our attention, our thoughts, and our focus.
That’s why it’s so important to be intentional with our mindset.
Make time to be present.
Put the phone down.
Talk to the people around you.
Check in with your family and your friends.
When we nurture our minds with positive thoughts, positive conversations, and meaningful connections, we create a healthier environment for ourselves and everyone around us.
3. Help Each Other
The third word focuses on helping others.
Helping each other in a good way.
This teaching reminds us that we’re not meant to go through life alone.
Where I come from, we’re taught that we are like brothers and sisters. Our responsibility is to uplift one another whenever we can.
Helping someone doesn’t always require a grand gesture.
Sometimes it’s as simple as offering encouragement.
A kind word.
A moment of support.
You never know what someone else is going through.
A single act of kindness can completely change someone’s day—or even their life.
I’ve experienced this firsthand through the kindness of others, including my friend Johan and his family. Their support during my childhood had a ripple effect that shaped the direction of my life.
And that’s the power of helping each other.
4. Keep Moving Forward
The fourth word carries a powerful message: perseverance.
Life will always bring challenges.
There will be moments when things feel overwhelming—when you question whether you can keep going.
But our teachings remind us to keep moving forward.
In many ceremonies, Elders encourage participants to push through difficult moments with courage and determination.
Sometimes people fast for days without food or water as part of spiritual ceremonies. During those times, Elders remind them not to give up.
Keep going.
Stay strong.
Those teachings apply to all of us.
Because often, the greatest blessings in life come disguised as challenges.
Sometimes we have to walk through difficult valleys before we discover the purpose waiting on the other side.
hiy hiy
